Nothing says ‘I care about animals’ like stripping off all your clothes.

Holly Madison, Hugh Heffner’s playmate girlfriend and soon-to-be wife, recently posed nude for a PETA ad against fur. The campaign shows Madison with a caption that says ‘I’d rather go naked than wear fur.’

Madison’s cause is surely noble, as she hopes to save the lives of innocent animals that would normally make their way onto rich girls’ coats. But why stop at saving animals? Why not save a plant by shunning cotton shirts? Why not save a factory by never wearing polyester? Why not even save a sweatshop kid by refusing to wear Nike?

Nudity solves all problems. The cavemen never had nuclear war. The cavemen never wore clothes. Coincidence? I think not.

The more clothes we wear, the more we put innocent animals, factories and people at risk. Take Hugh’s girl’s lead and tear off your wardrobe. Society needs you.