Fill out our Daily Orange reader survey to make our paper better


Column

Elmo asked how everybody’s doing, why aren’t we asking each other

Emma Lee | Contributing Illustrator

Our columnist argues that we’re socialized to place our entire worth on our productivity and put our mental health second. But we need to allow ourselves to sit in our feelings

Get the latest Syracuse news delivered right to your inbox.
Subscribe to our newsletter here.

Elmo is one of those characters who made my childhood a more fun period of my life – his child-like silliness, his scruffy red fur, his habit of referring to himself in the third person. He’s always been a comforting presence, one who offers honesty, safety and vulnerability and who brings out these same qualities in others.

That was never more apparent than this past month when Elmo’s account on X, formerly known as Twitter, tweeted, “Elmo is just checking in! How is everybody doing?”

It’s a question everyone has heard at one point in their lives, but, for seemingly no explicable reason, 20,000 people responded (and they responded honestly). Some replies posting memes and long-winded rants were for humorous effect, particularly from corporate accounts for Domino’s and Sour Patch Kids looking to get some free advertising.

Interestingly enough, the majority of the comments were people opening up about losing their jobs, experiencing economic instability and feeling immense dread about the state of the world. Others talked about their mental health struggles with depression, suicidal thoughts or grief over the loss of loved ones.



“I really really try to be happy and strong at work but, sometimes it’s just too much, Elmo. I’m struggling,” tweeted one user.

By the next day, it was enough to inspire the official Sesame Street account to post a link to mental health resources and other Muppet characters to spread words of encouragement. And while most people were ready to move on to the next social media trend, I wasn’t. This was an extraordinary moment of collective vulnerability, a rare blip of unity that was bigger than Elmo and a larger indication that, for a multitude of reasons, no one, in fact, is doing OK.

In a recent article about the viral moment, Nebel Crowhurst, the chief people officer at Reward Gateway, said, “The lesson from Elmo is clear: people want to be supported and listened to.”

Granted, X has always been one of those platforms where everyone is extremely honest, sometimes too much. Microblogging has become an art form in and of itself, with people documenting every aspect of their lives and every thought that pops into their heads. Honesty is inherent in the format through which we share those ideas.

This viral moment, though, is more than just regular X antics. It’s a sign that the state of the world and its plethora of problems internationally and domestically – global climate imbalance, genocide, multiple humanitarian crises, low minimum wage, high housing costs, lack of universal healthcare, social injustices – are costing us our sense of safety, happiness and, ultimately, our mental health.

We have plenty of reasons to be scared and miserable at this moment. But, what isn’t as clear is what we were doing about it or why we seemed so taken aback by a seemingly simple question.

When it’s a part of our casual social interactions, a throwaway line at the top of a conversation that we quickly move past, we don’t expect a truly honest response, so we don’t give one beyond a generic “I’m fine.” It’s not that we’re not asking each other how we’re doing – it’s that we’re not asking it seriously, not answering it honestly and not giving our state of being the weight and candor it deserves.

Yet it’s important to remember that the blame isn’t entirely on us. Under a capitalist system, we’re socialized to place our entire worth on our productivity and put our mental health second. We’re not supposed to acknowledge our exhaustion or unhappiness or stress or our feelings that something is wrong. We’re not supposed to ask if other people are feeling this way. We’re not supposed to voice our anger about the sheer number of things that are out of our control.

What is in our control, however, is how we look after one another. After all, in the face of such adversity, it’s our right – perhaps even our responsibility – to engage in community care. Sometimes that means supporting mutual aid funds or organizing a protest or dropping off a care package. And sometimes it’s as simple as asking how someone is doing and being honest about ourselves in return. We need to allow ourselves to sit in our feelings, be in solidarity with others and be inspired to make the world a better place or at least not feel so alone.

More than anything else, Elmo has taught me that we need to do a better job of initiating more open dialogues about our mental health. Yes, there are important things to be done and important issues to tackle but if we’re not facing our own problems, how can there be any hope of solving the ones plaguing all of us? In the end, we shouldn’t have to wait around for a stuffed puppet to ask us how we’re doing; we should already be asking that of each other and of ourselves.

Sofia Aguilar is a first-year grad student in the Library and Information Science program. Her column appears weekly. She can be reached at saguilar07@syr.edu.

membership_button_new-10





Top Stories