When Al Forbes got engaged three weeks ago, she realized it was time to tell her family that she is a lesbian.

Forbes, a senior psychology and sociology major, was one of eight people who shared their experiences during Coming Out Stories in Kittredge Auditorium on Wednesday night. The event, sponsored by the LGBT Resource Center, helps celebrate national Coming Out Month.

‘Coming out isn’t just for people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or trans,’ said Danielle Sutton, the emcee for the event and a graduate student in the School of Education. ‘It’s also for people who are allies. We wouldn’t be where we are today without allies.’

The audience ate pizza and drank soda while laughing about their peers’ comical coming out stories, showing occasional solemn faces when the stories turned serious. The event was an emotional celebration that showcased people who are proud of their sexuality.

The floor was open to anyone who wanted to share a story, and Forbes was the first one out of her seat. After she got engaged, she said she knew she had to come out to her family even though she was sure most of them already knew she was a lesbian.

‘My dad straight-up laughed in my face,’ Forbes said. ‘I think he thought that it would just come and go and he would never really have to think about it.’

Forbes’ dad finally gave her a hesitant congratulations, but she said the wedding won’t be any time soon. Forbes and her dad are on good terms now, and he approves of her fiancee.

Once the speakers finished talking, they received a miniature closet door. On the outside, it looked like any normal wooden door should. When opened, the inside of the door was painted in rainbow colors with the words ‘Coming Out Stories 2011.’

‘It’s liberating to tell your story,’ Forbes said. ‘It’s good to be an audience and a support system for them.’

Nick Haas, the president of Pride Union, said he was ‘kicked out of the closet.’

Identifying as queer and gay, Haas came out on his MySpace page at age 15, knowing his immediate family did not have access to it, he said. His cousin saw this and told Haas’ brother, who texted him asking if it was true. Trapped, Haas replied ‘yes.’ Within a week, Haas said his entire family knew.

‘My mom finally asked me, and I confirmed it,’ said Haas, a senior environmental resources engineering major. ‘Growing up, she always kind of put in little remarks like ‘Oh, I’m OK with gay people,’ but when it was her son, she kind of backed off a little.’

Haas said there are certain things about being queer and gay that his mother does not understand.

‘She’s done the questions like, ‘Are you sure you don’t just want to settle down and marry a girl and have a lover on the side?” he said as the audience laughed. ‘But is that more responsible and mature than just being truthful to who I am?’

Haas said he first came out to a best friend about a year before his parents found out, which he highly recommends to those struggling with coming out. If people don’t tell their best friend, then they should find someone who will ultimately be there for them and help them through the process, he said, instead of outing them to the rest of the world before they’re ready.

After the event was over, Haas said he was pleased with the turnout and the number of inspirational stories told. Every bit of education about LGBTQ helps the community, and Haas said there is still work that needs to be done to stifle homophobia.

‘There is still some homophobia that exists here on campus,’ said Haas, ‘but that’s why we’re out fighting the good fight, fighting the good fight.’

klross01@syr.edu 

Published on October 12, 2011 at 12:00 pm

Contact Kristin: klross01@syr.edu | @kriskross22